03 Feb 35 – 36 Weeks
My heart is racing whenever I think of how close we are now! In a month’s time, Rebecca will probably be here…
I get nervous every time I wake at night to go to the bathroom (several times!) and I realise how exhausted I am feeling – how will I cope once baby Rebecca is here? But I know I will – one manages somehow when you absolutely have to.
I’m also getting more and more frightened of the birth process… Until now, I have avoided thinking about it, but now it’s all too close to ignore. With Alex’s birth, natural birth, I experienced a very traumatic healing process afterwards, having received both an episiotomy and forceps delivery. The very memory of it makes me consider a C-section… I am truly so scared of going through that exact same trauma.
Because my itching flared up again the last two weeks, I decided to go for the liver test to rule out the possibility of ICP. Thank goodness, the tests are all clear, and the itching also went away again by itself.
I am seeing the gynae this week, so I might have new news soon. I am going to specifically chat with her about the birth process. I’m also quite nervous as this time it will be an internal check-up again…
I’m off to take a nap, as Alex is taking his nap now. I’m truly struggling to sleep at night! I dreamed last night that I went into labour and was quite concerned when I woke up this morning that I might be in labour!
Think of me – my mood is very ‘low’…